Remote Therapy

Couple Therapy is conducted by Dr. Torpey-Newman. The following is a description of what the couple therapy process typically looks like. Please feel free to contact Dr. Torpey-Newman if you have any further questions about the process.

In order to help you, we need to get to know your relationship and both of you as individuals. We do this during the first 3-4 sessions, which are primarily devoted to assessment, or information gathering.

Session 1: We will review the structure of therapy and limits of confidentiality and I’ll talk to you in depth about the therapy process. You will also tell me about what is going on in your relationship right now and what changes you’d like to see.

Session 2: During this session, we will focus on the history of your relationship. It is important for all of us to understand the factors that have contributed to the current state of your relationship.

Sessions 3 and 4: I will meet with each of you separately to discuss your individual histories. We are all shaped by our earlier experiences and this impacts how we interact with our romantic partners. It is very helpful to identify the expectations and vulnerabilities each of you is bringing into the relationship, as these often contribute to misunderstandings and emotional disconnect.

After these 4 sessions, we all discuss whether couple therapy is the most appropriate treatment for the problems you are experiencing. We also start to gain an understanding of the general pattern of communication that is occurring between you and your partner and is interfering with your bond.

Sessions 5 and after: If we decide to proceed with couple therapy, we will examine both the positive and negative interactions you’ve had with each other recently. What we usually find is that the pattern we’ve identified during the assessment phase of treatment comes up again and again during your interactions. We’ll all work together to help both of you be better able to identify this pattern when it comes up and to be able to communicate more effectively through it. We'll check in throughout treatment to make sure that you are making progress toward your relationship goals.

Making significant change in your relationship, like making any changes in our lives, can be a difficult and lengthy process. However, all of the couples with whom I have worked who have been able to communicate with their partners about their deepest vulnerabilities and sensitivities and who feel understood and supported when they do so have said that it is worth all of the hard work to get to that place of connection with the person they love the most.